Sunday, March 29, 2015

Weekling: W.21

For more posts in this series, go here: Weeklings


I had kind of a shit week, and I don't really feel like reflecting on it.  (I did get most of my to-do list done - about me section, morning routine post, excel sheet, and started making a plan for the pinterest/tumblr issues.)  With all that in mind, I decided this week's post is just going to be links.  HOW FUN.



101 Activities for Spring - The Freckled Fox (in case unlike me, you have a life and do things.)



Annnnd I think that's enough for now.  Fingers crossed next week is better, please. 

__
Charlotte

Saturday, March 28, 2015

Morning Routines

....are hard.


I've had morning routines before.  They were a bit easier when I had an apartment and a job that required me to be out of the door by 6:27am.  A set time frame keeps me more disciplined.  Now, I don't have my own apartment and I'm often doing things with other people, and have a little less time and space to do my own thing.  Also, my mood seems to be getting worse.  Add depression to chronic physical pain, and it's really hard for me to motivate myself to do anything.  So most days, I don't do all of these things.  I do try though.  

1. Pray.  Admittedly, the way I pray in the morning is sort of pathetic.  I usually just mutter something like, "I'm not dead.  Great.  Thanks, God!"  Told you, weak.  But I think it's important. 

2. Make the bed.  This is, hands down, the most essential part for me.  It's also not some super secret.  Google "good habits" or "habits of happy people" (which... problematic) and you'll often see people talk about what a difference making the bed can make.  For me, I prefer neatness and cleanliness.  I'm more productive when things are in order.  Also, I won't lay down once my bed is made.  It's not so much that I have some aversion to wrinkling the blankets so much as aversion to making the bed a second time.  (Laziness for the win.) 

3. Read.  Specifically, I read something religious (spiritual?  I don't know) every morning.  Obviously, that's not going to be the case for everyone.  But taking ten minutes to read something ~inspiring~ is a good idea.  During Lent, I've been reading this.  I haven't figured out what I want to read next.  I really, really want to read the Catechism of the Catholic Church, but I already own quite a few C.S. Lewis books, so I might opt to save money I don't have and read one of those instead.  

Those are the three things I do every morning.  There are more things I do as part of my "routine," but like I said, I haven't quite mastered doing each of them every day without fail. 

4. Read more.  So I always read something to help me get my praise on, but I also try to spend some time reading a regular book.  I love reading and I set a goal to read more this year.  I want to try for 50 books.  So I try to work toward that every morning.  I do this most mornings.  I enjoy it, I learn, I get a sense of accomplishment every time I hit a new chapter or finish a book, and I'm working toward a goal.  All good things to start the day. 

5. Exercise.  I have a very hard time with this.  I'm already out of shape, but to make matters worse, I'm in pain very often.  I have endometriosis, and the surgery I had a couple months ago wasn't entirely successful.  I still have growth around some of my organs, and it's painful.  Sometimes I wake up pain-free.  If that's the case, I exercise.  If the pain is just a dull ache I'll exercise.  If it's moderate, I'll take some Aleve or Ibuprofen while reading and hope it goes away.  If it's severe, I just can't be active.  BUT, what do I do for exercise?  If I'm at my grandparents' house I'll go play tennis against a brick wall or play a little basketball.  If I'm at my aunt's house, I'll do leg lifts and sit ups in the loft.  If I was back in Albany, I'd probably do the tennis and basketball or take walks through Washington Park, which is beautiful.   

6. Listen to a good song.  In college, I'd listen to Diva by Beyonce as I got dressed.  I remember my Bey-crazed friend, Nasha, bursting into my room once as soon as it came on.  Fun times.  Currently I enjoy listening to one or both of these: 



  
Solid taste, Char. 

I should mention that these don't guarantee a good day for me.  I can do all of the above and still have a bad day where I feel really lousy.  They're not a cure for depression, they're not a magic productivity pill, they're not grantors of happiness.  But I do think my chances of feeling good or being productive are improved when I do these things.  And even if I do have a bad day, I'd still have spent my morning doing good things, even if that's hard for me to recognize.

What are your morning routines? 

__
Charlotte 

  

Sunday, March 22, 2015

Weekling: W.20

For previous posts in this series, go here: Weeklings

Happenings 

Spring is happening, that's what.  It's been in the 60's or 70's every day this week and I've been loving it. 


Also, nothing has happened on the job front.  This is not good. 

What is good, though, is Shepard's pie from an Irish pub.  And these cool posters: 


I live at my aunt's house (and stay with my grandparents a few days a week), and so I help her at work a couple of days each week.  She works at a garden center.  I made these mixed pots and while I based what I paired together on the amount of sun they need, I'm not sure how fast each kind of plant grows, so basically I'm just keeping fingers crossed that when they grow and become full, they'll look good. 


I've started playing a little tennis.... against a brick wall. 


I actually find it hard to play against a wall.  I need to find someone who is just below mediocre to play against. 

Thankful for

Aforementioned weather. 

Books I'm Reading Now

I've made March a bit of a catch-up month, after neglecting my lists big time last month.  Right now I'm working on a Nicholas Sparks book (cheap and easy, I know) and that Lenten book. 

Random 

I knew the ACA was kind of crap, but wow I didn't realize just how bad it was.  I already mentioned that I wasn't eligible for Medicaid in NC because I'm older than 22 but under 40-something and I'm not disabled or pregnant.  Well, I'm not eligible for the subsidies the government gives to help pay for private insurance, either, since I "make below the poverty level.  So... disease and surgeries that I need, but no insurance.  Sort of scary. 

To-do

Well.............. I accomplished close to nothing last week, so.  The same to do list.  

1. Spreadsheet. 
2. Morning routine post. 
3. Fix links on pinterest and tumblr. 
4. Improve "about me" section. 

Links worth looking at







Five Ways to Practice Forgiveness - Catholic Exchange


How to Read a Book Per Week - Early to Rise

Fun Fact

I only really like vanilla ice cream when it's paired with pie.  

__
Charlotte

Sunday, March 15, 2015

Timeline

"You know, there's nothing I'd like to peruse more than a bunch of pictures of you."

-Thought no one, ever.

Your wish is my command.
































I like to end all posts with optimism. 

My main take away from this is that I have never been good at smiling and should probably get on that.  Probably.
__
Charlotte

Weekling: W.19

For previous posts in this series, go here: Weeklings


Happenings

Last week I changed the name of the blog, this week I (mostly) finished changing the look of it.  All of the links on the pages are now fixed.  It wasn't hard work, but it was very annoying work.  Next up is changing the links for tumblr and pinterest.  Meh. 

This week looked like this: 


The Hunger Games was filmed here.....

And here.

The weather is finally finally nice enough to enjoy.  I made the mistake of trying out the water.  Guys, not nice enough to swim.  

I've talked about how paranoid I get before, but just to seal the deal on how crazy I am, I'm gonna tell you a little story.  (This might be weird to put on a blog but Liz already knows and she's approx. 50% of my readership, so...)  We all know I have endometriosis and it's not good.  To keep it from getting worse, I had to start birth control.  I don't want to be on birth control when I'm married, but right now it's only being used for the endo, and not for contraception, so that part is fine.  But, I really did not want to be on it at all.  A basic rule of thumb around here is that if something bad can happen, it will.  I know this sounds horrible, but my last year looked something like this: 

Needed new car, had only a short time to get it. 
New car gets broken into. 
New car gets crashed into. 
Tooth infection travelling to brain and heart, prompting emergency surgery. 
Part of tooth accidentally left in mouth. 
Abnormal blood work. 
Gallstones. 
Gallbladder removal surgery. 
Follow-up exam discovers problems with liver, pancreas. 
Further testing shows enlarged lymph node causing some trouble in abdomen. 
Antidepressants causing paranoia. 
Went off antidepressants, lolgoodluck trying to get better
Lost job because instead of travelling the agreed 4-6 hours a week, my supervisor wanted me to do 10-12.  (Fairness.) 
Mass on ovary. 
Need to abruptly move to NC, away from where my life is.
Surgery scheduled. 
Surgery finds more extensive problems, another surgery needed.
Loses health insurance.  
Around three trips to ER and over 30 blood withdrawals.  

And it wasn't my worst year ever.

So yes.  I was wary as anything to start birth control because I can deal with sore and bigger boobs and I can deal with some mood swings, but I don't want to get blood clots.  I know how unlikely it is.  But it's a possible side effect and at this point my mind automatically says, "With your luck, the side effects will all happen."  And especially without insurance, I can't handle having a blood clot.  So what does this translate into?  Me, being completely rational, going for long walks or doing squats or what have you, all to try to increase my movement and decrease already minuscule chances of developing a clot.  

I mean, the extra exercise is good, and I'm losing weight and my body is continuing to feel a bit lighter and better.  But the excessive anxiety is problematic.  

Working on it.  

Thankful for

Pie.  The fact that I'm not dead from blood clots.  Ha.  Ha? 

Books I'm reading now

Finishing up The Book Thief, again.  I can't make my mind up on this book.  The first time I read it, I was bored in the beginning, then I thought it was really good.  The second time, I'm torn between "eh" and thinking it's good.  I don't know. 

Also starting a reread of Love Walked In by Marisa de los Santos because I love this book and I want March to be a catch-up month for reading. 

Random

So, the job search.  It continues.  I'm not including it on my to-do list, because at this point it's an all-the-time activity.  But, let me tell you.  I filled out an application, and one of the questions went something like this: 

Are you currently looking for work? 

No.  I just thoroughly enjoy filling out applications, especially when all of the requested information can already be found on my resume, which you also require.  

The south. 


To-do

Type out my morning routine post.  Enthralling. 

Make a new and improved "about me" section. 

Fix the pinterest and tumblr links.  Kill me. 

Start using a detailed spreadsheet to plan blog posts.  I know this sounds absurd, but at one point, I had an Excel sheet, color coded with post ideas.  I had a schedule of posts and I was a little more on top of it all.  Lately, I'm averaging one or two posts a week.  When I had the sheet, I was writing more and I was getting around 50 page views a day.  I don't anticipate (or know if I want) this blog becoming some great huge blog, but I don't think I'd mind it being a little bigger than it currently is.  I read somewhere that bloggers should write and maintain their blogs as though they're receiving a million views a day.  I like that idea. 

Links worth looking at

In true Charlotte fashion, I am going to slack on the links.  Most of them are from Buzzfeed, so you know how much effort is going into this section. 

This is for Everyone Who Thinks Snape is a Hero - Buzzfeed  I could write a whole post on this, and maybe I will, but yes.  Snape was brave, but he wasn't a hero.  Heroes don't generally torture people.


Joe Biden Posted a Vine of Him Doing Bicep Curls Because He's Joe Biden - Buzzfeed I love Joe Biden and this vine will make you laugh.  Unless you're a monster. 

What it Feels Like to Live With Depression - Thought Catalog This is by far the most accurate description I've read.  "The simplest, most mundane tasks of daily life seem to require a Herculean effort. I remember standing in the shower one morning, feeling that picking up the shampoo bottle was almost too difficult to bear."  Yes.  The other day I pulled up to the house, and I just sat in my car, wanting to turn it off, unbuckle my seat belt, and get out.  But for five minutes, I just sat there, not moving.  It's intense. 

17 Important Tips for Making the Most of Curly Hair - Buzzfeed I can't attest to all of these, but basically the front left side of my hair is 3C, the front right and most of the top layer of my hair is 3B, and the layers underneath are 3A.  Discovering the diffuser changed my life. 

Fun Fact:

Every time I try to type the word "accidently," "accidentally," I spell it wrong.

__
Charlotte 


Friday, March 13, 2015

Thoughts on Grey's Anatomy.

There might be some spoilers in this. 

I wasn't even going to write this post, because I doubt anyone will care.  But then I remembered Stephanie reads this blog and watches Grey's Anatomy.  So it shall be written.

I didn't jump on the Grey's bandwagon until most people jumped off.  This is kind of a theme in my life.  Oh well.  That said, I've been a weekly watcher for the last three years, mostly thanks to aforementioned roommate.  I've watched all the past seasons twice now, so I'm basically  an expert.  Right, that's how it works?

Well, I just finished watching the most recent episode (I Feel the Earth Move) and was like, "I have opinions about this."  So here we are.  A few ridiculous, short, not at all important things I think about Grey's Anatomy. 

1. It is so dark.  Not metaphorically.  Just in general, the last few seasons forgot what light is while filming.  I'm assuming they keep the lights so low because they want to keep it dramatic, but there were plenty of dramatic scenes in the earlier seasons and there was better lighting.  I HATE the darkness.  Aside from the fact that it's just not my thing, let's be real, hospitals aren't that dark.  I don't care that it's a fictional TV show.  Turn on some lights.  

2. Callie is by far my favorite character.  I didn't like her very much when she first joins the show, but I think that's because I hated her hair so much.  Wow, am I horrible.  But really, her hair is so nice now.  Her character is awesome.  I think she comes off as the most sincere and probably the most realistic.  


3.  I don't think I like where the show is going as a whole.  There are good parts (Amelia and Owen, Maggie, Alex), but as a whole it's just... eh.  First of all, I hope they don't end Meredith and Derek's marriage.  I know divorce is a real thing in the real world, but it won't kill the show to have some lasting marriages.  I'm down with a little marital strife, but I think it would negate basically the last 10 seasons to end their marriage.  And I'm not loving the Callie-Arizona story line for similar reasons.  That's also just confusing, and I kind of wish the writers would just pick a story for them.  I don't like that Derek is not in any of the episodes, and I miss his hair.  Hopefully he'll be back soon.  The show is not the same without Cristina, either, though I suppose they're doing as best they can without her. 

4. I see a lot of Amelia-hate on the internet, but screw that.  I like her.  She's kind of very annoying sometimes, but so is every other person in both the fictional and real worlds, so... she's fine.  I like her back story and I like her dynamic with Owen.  

5.  I used to despise Kepner.  I don't adore her now, but I dislike her less, and the recent story line she and Jackson shared was touching, though I still find their relationship weird.  In general, Grey's does a pretty bad job of developing relationships.  I think they're often good at individual character development, but they often do a shit job of showing why people become couples.  Four out of five times they rely on nothing attraction at first sight, if anything.  

6.  I love Maggie and I think she was a necessary addition to the show.  It desperately needed a fresh new face. 

7. Meredith is not the sun.  In Cristina's final episode, she told Meredith that she was the sun, not Derek.  But... no.  No person is the center of the effing universe, and until this most recent episode, Meredith was annoying me so much.  I love that Meredith is a kickass surgeon, a devoted mom, and a wife.  And she is exceptional (89 surgeries without losing one patient?? Amazing.), but being exceptional is not a pass to worry about no one but yourself.  I understood when she told Derek she wasn't going to DC.  Any kind of relationship is about compromise, especially marriage, and she had already done so frequently for him.  But then she started acting hella immature when he decide to turn down the job offer.  She sort of reverted back to her old self. I'm not going to list all of the crap she did to annoy me, because if you watch the show you probably know what I'm talking about.  That said, in yesterday's episode she had a sort of epiphany.  She realized she didn't need Derek in order to be successful, but she wanted him and wanted to share her life with him.  That was cool, and it felt like she finally was back to, you know, maturity.  (Though I don't think there's anything wrong with needing people.  Everybody needs people.  But the point was that she is skilled and happy, and sharing that with him just makes it better.  Most excellent.) 

8.  The writers were able to continue the show without Izzy and George.  And without Sloan and Lexi.  And it looks like they might even be able to get by without Cristina (though it's not the same). But they would never be able to keep the show going without Bailey and/or Webber.  I love both of them.  

That's it.  God bless Grey's. 

__
Charlotte 

Monday, March 9, 2015

By Any Other Name


I've been thinking about changing the name of the blog for a few months now.  

The old name, 40:8 and Me, worked.  I liked it, but didn't love it.  I wrote about why I chose that name in this post, but to give a quick explanation... it was for the psalm.  More specifically, this part of one man's interpretation of the psalm: 

Want to know God’s will for your life?  Then answer this question: What ignites your heart? Forgotten orphans?  Untouched nations?  The inner city?  The outer limits?
Heed the fire within!

I wanted to be prompted to think about "the fire" daily.  

It worked, for the most part.  But it lost meaning somewhere along the way, and for, I think, good reason:  I started to automatically think this way.  I have a lot of bad days.  Probably more bad than good.  But numerous times throughout each day, I think about what I believe I'm supposed to be doing and I try to figure out how to do it.  And, I have become really, really good at remembering that every other person I meet is also called to do something, is also meant to "heed the fire within."  It's made me love people with greater ease.  It's made me the kind of person who works to help other people do what they love to do.  

That's a pretty damn good outcome from a blog name.  

The problem?  

I focus more on thinking about what I should be doing instead of doing what I should be doing.  Thinking about 40:8 started to become more of a passive thing instead of an active one, if that makes sense.  (Well, and if it doesn't.  It makes sense to me.)  And so I didn't think it was something that could last and that could speak to my current life and to el futuro.  I felt like I needed a new name that would do those things.  

And this is when I reveal how nutty I am.  The reason for the new name.  

I think most people have baby names picked out, regardless of whether or not they know they want kids and regardless of when they think they want kids.  I think that's pretty normal.  But I like thinking about baby names probably too much, and when I sat and tried to figure out why, 

Green turtle necks are IN. 
I realized it's because I like to think of a super shiny, fun, nice future.  That's not a bad thing usually.  But when you only think about a pretend future and don't do anything NOW because you're not a fan of your current life and you're definitely definitely not a fan of your past, it's probably bad.

So I did what any other kind of weird person would do and decided that the new blog name could be one of the names I like.  It's not meant as a blog to a future child(ren), though Liz pointed out that a future kid could read it.  So it's like an added aspect, not the point.  It's also not meant to be an alter-ego.  Using a baby name is sort of like a symbol that I shouldn't only be imagining a nice future - I should also be trying to make a nice now.  You know?  A little weird?  Whatever.

And because of that meaning, I think it's something that will always be relevant.  I know a name can't be everything and can't make me happy but if I'm going to use this blog to chronicle my efforts at something better, the name of it is going to mean something.

__
Charlotte

Sunday, March 8, 2015

Weekling: W.18

For previous posts in this series, go here: Weeklings

I missed last week.  Not the first time and probably not the last.  I was super sick and in too much pain to do anything.  As in, I couldn't even handle watching Netflix.


Happenings

Not much excitement over here, but I did see those odd things in a thrift store.  I came very close to getting the jar with sock dolls and sending it to Olivia.  I resisted, though, so Olivia missed lucked out.  Personally, I think the cat photos are less creepy and more quirky.  Maybe that's just me, though.

Still no job, and I'm dying because of it.  I have a small list of jobs to apply for, so, fingers crossed, as always. 

I want to be in New York.  I'm not much of a southerner.  However, it hit 79 degrees this week.  Seventy Nine!!  Ah.  As I'm writing this, the sun is shining and a comfortable breeze is blowing through the window.  I'll take it. 

Also, I changed the blog name.  (This probably should have been listed first, not fourth, but hindsight.)  There's a good but probably crazy reason for the new name, and I'll write a post on it tonight or tomorrow, but I think it's here to stay.  

Thankful for

I've been reading God is on the Cross: Reflections on Lent and Easter.  I'll save a description for my next book review post, but it's very calming to read every morning and a little calm is something I'm glad to have. 

Books I'm reading now

See above.  But also, instead of making any progress on my own book list, I'm rereading parts of The Book Thief because my little sister asked me to.  I just feel "eh" about this book. 

Random

Two weeks ago, I said I wanted to come up with a plan for a book.  I'm shocked to say that I actually thought fairly hard about it and came up with a plan. I still have a few things I need to settle on, but once I do I will bore you all with the idea.  

And since I can't think of anything else to say, look at this random picture of delicious apple pie I made: 

wow, pie. 
 To-do

GET A JOB.  Going nuts here. 

Make a morning plan.  I'm a morning person (though lately I haven't been able to fall asleep earlier than 1am, and so... less of a morning person) but I want to be productive in the morning, not just lay in bed doing nothing for an hour or two.  When I do, I'll make a whole post about it.  (Morning routines and book layouts... should have renamed the blog Mundane Molly.)  

Links worth looking at

Wow am I a slacker.  I did save some links, but I have other things to do so I'm cutting this short and not attaching all of those links.  Whatever.  I WILL share this one though: 

Because I did just say I wanted to do this.  Want to join me? 

Bonus

The last two times I wrote these, it started snowing.  Happy to report that the sun is still shining. 

Dream house, dream weather. 
__
Charlotte

Thursday, March 5, 2015

The Best Books to Read with Your Closest Friends - Part 1


Update: Part two right here

As I was wasting my life away on the internet today, I came across a nifty Buzzfeed post: 19 Books You Should Read With Your Closest Friends.  It's a nice, quick read, and a lot of the books sound wonderful.  I've read a handful of them.  I'm particularly fond of Harry Potter, you know.  That said, the author gave reasons the books were good.  She didn't necessarily explain why they'd be good to read with friends.  So because I'm not feeling creative or smart enough to come up with my own post topic, I'm going to make a list of books I think would be great to read with close friends. 

(Disclaimer:  I'm going to list some of these as great books to read with your close friends at a particular age.  I'm 23, so this will probably be lacking.)

1.  Let's start by pointing out that the author was right to include The Perks of Being a Wallflower.  I read this when I was in my third or fourth year of college.  I enjoyed it, but I think I might have enjoyed it more if, like many of my friends, I had read it while a senior in high school.  I consider it a good book, not a great book.  (I happen to adore the movie.  The dance scene!)


Why is it great to read aloud or simultaneously with your friend(s)?   

If you're around 16-21 and you read this book with your friends, you will likely have a lot to talk about.  I mean, this holds true if you're not those ages, but since they're dealing with high school and college, you'll probably relate to it a bit.  The reason it's great to read with close friends is that the characters have a lot of serious issues going on.  Aside from lessons in empathy and personal struggle, it's a good conversation starter if you've been wanting to tell your friend something but didn't feel comfortable with it or didn't know how to bring it up.  In the book the characters have to handle things like sexual abuse, drug use, childhood abuse, and being gay in a place where it's not safe to be gay.  Those are things that real people go through.  After reading this book, one of my friends said something along the lines of, "yeah, that's how I felt," when talking about Patrick's boyfriend hiding from his dad.  Until then, this friend didn't know how to talk about his personal struggle with coming out.  No matter how close you are with your friends, there are things you might not feel comfortable talking about.  This book can help get that conversation started, if you do want to talk about something you've gone through. 

2.  Another winner on that original list!  Harry Potter!  The entire series will forever be my favorite, and I could go on and on about why, but... time is a thing and this is not that post.  

“Differences of habit and language are nothing at all if our aims are identical and our hearts are open.”

Harry Potter is terrific to read with your closest friends because Harry Potter is terrific to read in any and every situation, with all people.  I think the main reason for this is that it has such universal values.  On top of that, though, magic is fun.  There's so much room for wonder in the series.  And because it has an entire made up world, there's no end to possible discussions.  It's also pretty well written.  And there are so many kinds of people in it.  Your closest friend is really into sports and stuff?  Cool, he or she will probably love the series.  The sports in the wizarding world are intense.  I cannot fathom a hardcore sports fan not getting worked up about the Triwizard Tournament.  I mean, dragons?  Come on now. And Quidditch?  Don't pretend you haven't imagined yourself playing.  

Or maybe your closest friend really loves school.  She relates to Hermione.  

Orrrrr maybe your closest friend was from a poor family and relates to the Weasley family.  Or maybe s/he didn't have parents and related to Harry.  It goes on and on and on.  When you read the series, there's no way you and your friend won't feel connected to certain characters or story lines.  And when you read it together, it'll likely bring you even closer, because friendship is one of the main themes throughout the books.  Two friends reading about friendship (and the sacrifices, the gifts, etc that come with it) have no choice but to become even better friends.  JUST TRY AND PROVE ME WRONG. 

And just to beat my own record of longest blog post saying the same thing over and over... and over.  There's another reason to read this with your friend(s)!  Especially as you get older, I think it's a terrific idea to read this with your absolute closest friends more than once.  Or at least, reread them along with your friends.  There are seeds that are planted in our brains when we read HP for the first time, but those seeds can really start to grow when you read the books critically with your friends.  (Bear with me on the seed analogy.  I have to work at a greenhouse some days, so fresh on the mind...)  As you and your friend(s) get older and have to live in the real world, there will be so much more to explore in the series.  You can start to see feminism.  You'll start to see Christian themes.  You'll see themes of oppression and revolution.  As a kid, I understood the basic good vs evil structure in the books.  As I got older, and more importantly as I started talking about the books with my friends, I started to see the ways Rowling depicts women (magnificently), how the main characters often mirror Christ, how Hermione's devotion to SPEW was badass.  And we start to apply those lessons to real life, and I honestly believe it makes us more mindful people.  Better people.  

Also, if your good friend happens to be someone you're crushing on, the Hermione-Ron relationship gives ample room for you to drop not-so-subtle hints like, "Wow, see how amazing and beautiful it is for these two good friends to enter into a relationship and get married and have babies?  Are you seeing this?  Wow look how possible!  WOW THEY ARE OUR AGE! WOW WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?"

Ahem.

3. A People's History of the United States.  I read this in high school for a class.  It was good then.  But know what was better?  Reading it with close friends in college.  We grow up thinking America is the greatest thing (especially if we're white because we're not given immediate reason to dispute that in our everyday lives), and it's really hard to question that.  It's also very uncomfortable in an itchy sweater sort of way to realize the ways in which you're privileged or the kinds of things you've been turning a blind eye at and sometimes, if you want to talk about that, it's best to do it with a good friend who isn't going to judge you but also is going to tell it to you straight.  Especially great to read with friends from different backgrounds, whether racial or economical.  

4. For this next one, we're gonna make it fun by having a board game option at the end.  Grab your best friend and read Murder on the Orient Express together.  

This is slightly cheating, because there's nothing touching or heartwarming or anything like that to make it great to read with close friends.  So why is it on this list?  WELL.  I have this thing where I can't be an ahole to strangers.  But my best friends?  Lol yeah, hi.  This book is a mystery.  Not only is it a mystery, but it's a wonderfully written mystery, the kind where the facts and the circumstances are laid out but you can't quite solve it on your own.  So, aside from being absolute fun to read with friends, you can have a bit of a bet on it.  (Apparently I think betting is an ahole activity?)  You and your friends can all guess what the ending will be, and whoever is closest wins something, OR the people who are furthest from the correct ending have to do something horrible.  Basically a more in-depth version of truth or dare.  (I always go with dare.)  

And when the book is done and the dares are dished out, you and your friends can enjoy a game of Clue.  With or without a few wine coolers.

This is on here because I play board games with close friends and rarely with acquaintances.  Social.  Anti. 

5. You already know I am a big fan of Mindy Kaling.  Her show is my favorite on TV at the moment.  Her book, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns) is also awesome.  I haven't technically read this "with" a friend, but when my old roommate, Stephanie, read it I heard constant laughter.  And because she's the sharing sort, Steph would often read me excerpts.  This is the sort of book that would be hilarious to read together (everything is funnier when you're exposed to other people cracking up), but at times it's got a personal feel to it, so I wouldn't read it with anyone other than a good friend. 

“I’m only marginally qualified to be giving advice at all. My body mass index is certainly not ideal, I frequently use my debit card to buy things that cost less than three dollars because I never have cash on me, and my bedroom is so untidy it looks like vandals ransacked the Anthropologie Sale section. I’m kind of a mess.” 

Only my close friends can join me in side eye-ing one another with the, "yeah that's us" look after reading that sentence.  

You feel me? 

So I guess that's where I'll end the first part of this.  I plan on having three parts.  I think reading books with the people who mean the most to you can be a really intimate thing.  But it can also be good fun, and it's probably a better idea for bonding than a trip to McDonalds to test out the new menu items.  Probably.  

Read on. 

Part 2 here.