Black Lives Matter

A few years ago a family member of mine, who is white, was chased by police.  He was a felon, he had been in a stolen car, and cops were aware of him.  When he saw them approaching, he ran.  He also had a gun on him.  He entered a nearby business building, pointed the gun (which I'm told wasn't loaded) at a man, and demanded that they trade clothes, presumably so he could get away without the police recognizing him.  His plan didn't work, and the police apprehended him.  The did so without any use of violence.  

Here's a question - how come 12 year old Tamir Rice was shot on spot for holding a bb gun, without any attempt from the police to solve the situation first, but police make every possible effort to stop a grown white man from using the hand gun he is pointing at another person?  If the police wanted to, they could have found a way to get Rice to put the bb gun down and a family wouldn't be grieving the loss of their 12 year old boy.  

After Michael Brown was shot and the country erupted into protests, we saw the rise of #blacklivesmatter.  Sadly, too many white people insist on changing this to "#ALLlivesmatter."  I guess it's a panicked impulse that goes along with colorblindness.  Here's the thing though.  Fellow white people, please stop trying to be included in this.  Society already values white lives.  When a white felon can run into an office building wielding a gun and not be shot, it's because society knows his life matters.  When James Holmes can walk into a movie theater with a gun and kill 12 people while wounding upwards of 70 more and then be arrested - not shot - it's because society values white lives.  

17 year old Trayvon Martin was stalked and killed because he was black, and his killer didn't face jail time.  The boy was unarmed and on his way home.  

Michael Brown was stopped for walking.  He was shot numerous times.  His killer isn't even facing a trial.  He was unarmed.  

Eric Garner was selling cigarettes* when a police officer decided to put him in a chokehold.  There is video footage showing the officer strangling Garner while Garner gasps, "I can't breathe," and his killer is not going to face trial.  

Yes, white people.  Our lives are important.  But no one is questioning that.  We don't get followed in stores because anyone suspects we're going to steal.  We don't get stopped on the street for no reason whatsoever.  And if we're committing a crime, there is a very, very good chance that we get arrested instead of killed.  

Every life has the same moral worth, regardless of race.  But society does not treat people of color as such.  Moreover, we are not all equal by a long shot.  Not economically, politically, or socially.  We say "black lives matter" because the police already know white lives matter.  The government already knows white lives matter.  And everyone who fights for justice already knows all lives matter.  But until black people can walk down the street without getting shot by the very people meant to protect them, yes, we need to make it clear that specifically, black people are important and their lives matter.  

This is circulating around Facebook and Twitter.

This does not happen when suspects are white.  And sometimes's it's overt racism.  Other times, and this is horrible, it's totally internal.  According to his testimony, Darren Wilson felt threatened by Michael Brown.  At some point, white people need to get over our discomfort with talking about race and truly look at ourselves.  How come a cop standing over six feet tall looks at a black man roughly the same height and thinks, "Hulk Hogan?"  How come a man sees a black teenage boy and feels the need to call the police, follow him, and interrogate him, before murdering him?  

The system is built on institutionalized racism, I know that.  That's part of why police officers can kill unarmed black men and not even face trial.  It's why so many black people live in poverty, why minorities face more jail time more often than white people.  

But there's more to it.  I honestly do not think the majority of white people think of black people as equal to them.  It's why we say things like, "you act white!" to our black friends who speak like we do.  We're effectively saying, "You're smart!  You speak the right way!  You're normal!"  

I used to say things like that, and I am so, so grateful that God sent me a professor who assigned The New Jim Crow, two black roommates, and a slew of new friends who were much smarter than me to really open my eyes.  Because four years ago, I would have been using #ALLlivesmatter.  Now I know better.  And I think it's another reason why it's so important to continue the narrative of "black lives matter."  Because we need to understand that not only do black lives need to matter when it comes to the "justice" system, but they need to matter every day.  Because let me ask you (especially any of my white middle class friends) - how many black teachers did you have in elementary school?  How many black friends?  Black doctors?  Jim Crow ended, but segregation is still very much alive.  And it is damn near impossible to understand that black lives matter just as much as white lives if all you've known is white people, if the only time you see black people is when you're locking your doors driving in their neighborhoods.  So yeah, #blacklivesmatter should be here to stay.  White people should be listening to black folks when they tell their stories.  White people should constantly remind themselves that it doesn't matter if a black kid stole a few cigars, his life was still precious.  There is no doubt in my mind that there would be uproar from white communities if a 12 year old named Adam Johnson was shot dead by police for any reason.  

So use #blacklivesmatter when you're on Twitter.  Use it when you're commenting on the legal system and say it to yourself when you're about to comment on how a black man wears his pants.  Use it all the time.  

*It's not even certain that Eric Garner was doing anything wrong.  Apparently, he might have actually been breaking up a fight.  Either way, his murder is unacceptable. 

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Charlotte

Mystery Kick

There are actual important things I can write about, but since I am not feeling worldly and smart, instead I'll just write about some books I've read recently.

I love mystery, but I don't usually read it for several weeks straight.  For some reason, maybe it's because I'm in what feels like a perpetual bad mood, it's pretty much all I've read lately.

1. The Charm School by Nelson DeMille

So, I've read seven or eight of DeMille's books.  I'm not sure that I would like DeMille in real life.  Sometimes the women in his books are objectified, the characters lack empathy, and ethnocentrism runs deep.  So that bothers me occasionally while reading his stuff.

That said, pretty much every book I've read of his has called into question the idea of government spying, and I like that.  And I like the stories themselves.  My favorite is still Plum Island, because there was so much to it, and the ending wasn't predictable from the start.  But The Charm School was good and thrilling.  I read it in two days, and it's over 600 pages.  DeMille knows how to write a page-turner really well.  The book starts with a murder of an American kid in the Soviet Union, and the US embassy needs to figure it out.  There's loads of international and personal drama, doubt, and CIA bs, so that was all good fun.  I'd recommend it to anyone who likes conspiracy and mystery.

2. Murder on the Orient Express by Agatha Christie

The Charm School was good, but this book was great.  My friend came over and saw my book shelves, which were organized by genre.  He dismissed the mystery section, telling me it wasn't a real mystery section without Agatha Christie.  So, I bought this book.  I read it in a day because it was so freaking good.

For starters, it's really well written.  Also, it's playful but in a serious way.  I don't really know how to describe it.  I mean, the detective plays with his mustache, but the vibe is still mature I guess.  I don't know.  Read the book.

The mystery itself was interesting, and the whole thing felt like I was playing Clue.  I liked the way it was set up (The Place, The Facts, The Evidence, The Testimony or something like that).  And I liked that there was a bit of a moral question at the end, so you were forced to think about what you would do in the situation.  This is a horrible description, but I don't want to give the story away.  GO READ IT.

Also, the cover of the book is really cool.  I think, whenever I do get an apartment, I'm going to get the cover blown up and frame it.  Check it:

This is not rectangular like the actual book and it annoys me. 

So yes.  Go read these.  Or don't.

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Charlotte

Vote for Howie Hawkins

That's right, I said it.  In this post I wrote the other day, I mentioned that I wasn't sure if I was going to vote for Howie or not.  I agree with almost everything he stands for, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to throw my support behind the green party.  Well, this election, I do.  They're the only party that is truly listening to the stories of working people.  

Howie supports a $15 minimum wage.  That is monumental, and it is essential.  I make $8.50 at my job right now, and I bring home a little over $600 a month.  I'm on the verge of homelessness and every night I pray that my car hasn't been repossessed and will still be outside the next morning.  I lost my full time job a few months ago, I've had health problems that required surgery, and surviving is nearly impossible.  You know what a small, incremental change means when we talk about minimum wage?  It means not enough.  

The minimum wage went up to $8.00 last year and I'm still struggling.  If it went up to $15, I'd be able to pay my bills again.  I wouldn't get ten calls from debt collectors every day.  I'd be able to put $20 from each paycheck into a savings account.  

That's what Howie Hawkins supports.  

Another thing?  His education policies are by far the best of all three candidates.  He wants quality, free education for everyone k-12 an higher ed.  He wants parents and teachers to shape children's learning by opting out of corporate-backed common core and high stakes testing.  Howie supports free tuition at public colleges and universities.  I have $40,000 in debt from school, and no one should have that burden.  

If you take a look at his platform,  you'll see that his policies are reflections of what the public needs.  Better schools, living wages, clean water, affordable housing, better public transportation.  

It comes down to this: Howie's agenda is one of radical change. 

The WFP and its allies are telling us to vote for Cuomo on the WFP line to maintain the party's power.  "If Cuomo receives WFP votes, he'll know the people really want change."  (I'll repeat what I said in that other post: the only message Andrew Cuomo will receive if he gets a ton of WFP votes is that his strategy of bullying and manipulation works.)  The argument is that this will give the party leverage to work with Cuomo and pressure him into making positive changes in NY.  

I'll tell you what.  I do not need the possibility of small, incremental change that comes with a solid showing of WFP Cuomo votes.  I need radical change, and I need it yesterday.  

If you feel like you are willing to gamble on this, then maybe you should vote Cuomo (but probably not).  But if you know that NY needs a better living wage, a better education system, and better tax policies, then you should absolutely vote for Howie Hawkins.  His platform is the only platform that will help us all, and quite frankly he is the only trustworthy candidate.  If you are sick of the old strategy of "voting for the lesser of two evils," dump the republican and the democrat, and vote for Howie Hawkins.  You'll be glad you did.  

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Charlotte

Letter to Myself, to Read 10 Years From Now

dayzeroproject.com is a website where you list your goals and then check them off as you do it.  One of the most popular ones is to write your future self a letter.  I did that, but I'm writing it on here, too, because, well, God forbid a fire or tornado or some sort of natural disaster.  (Paranoia.)  There are some things I left out. 

Dear Charlotte, 

First off, I feel ridiculous writing this.  But, in the name of either courage or stupidity, I'm gonna do it anyway.  

I really hope life if better now that ten years have passed.  Because it currently sucks.  For the most part, that is.  You have no full time job, no boyfriend, no apartment.  But, on the plus side, you opened a fresh can of Maxwell House coffee this morning, and that is one of your favorite things.  (The sound it makes and the feel of the lid coming off.   I don't know.  You're strange.  Or were.)  Studies show that global warming is a threat to coffee production, so this might not be a thing for you anymore, ten years later.... Thanks, Obama.  

Today, you're like, 240 pounds.  That's really unacceptable, mostly because walking up a flight of stairs shouldn't make you gasp for air.  You've vowed to work on it though, and are in the process of becoming a member of a recreation center.  You go, Glenn Coco!  (Hopefully I didn't lose too much weight, though.  As Nicki Minaj says, "Anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hun... where my fat ass bitches at?")  My goal is around 160-175, because I've looked and felt good at that weight before.  Hopefully you're still around there, but if you've had kids, you're fine (insert positive statement about the physical marks of motherhood here).  

Hopefully you're married (maybe to _________?? sorry, internet, no specifics) with kids.  I'd like that.  But, if not, that's okay too.  It's sort of ambitious since you don't currently have a boyfriend.  33 isn't that old, so no worries.  It also just occurred to me that maybe suggesting a future husband wasn't a good idea, because if it's not him, well... awkward.  Also, I should have used a different pen to write this.  My handwriting is weak with this pen. 

On a bigger scale, I'm hoping the revolution has happened!  Or is happening!!  Because 1. things are bad and capitalism is ruining everything and 2. I bet Joe that it would happen soon.  

This year has been your year of fixing (or trying to, any way) health issues.  It's my sincere hope that you're not experiencing this crap any longer.  You (I?) also have some mental issues, especially re: depression and confidence, but working on that, too, so maybe you're not so bad.  

You don't have any one best friend.  But this is good, because like Mindy Lahiri says, "best friend isn't a person, Danny, it's a tier."  Your tier has a few people on it.  Some of them I don't refer to as friends because they're old or the relationships with them aren't really of a typical friendship nature, but I guess they're part of the tier.  I hope you still talk to Emily, Liz, Mark, PFT, Sera, Steph, Alison, Joe, and Kevin (maybe).  They're the people you talk to most often and most openly.  (If I did not include you, it's only because I don't talk to you more than 5 times a week.  Let's change that :)  Oh, and Olivia, but she feels more like an extension of myself.  

I hope you're happy (or trying to be), better at being a Catholic, that you've written your damn book, and that you're struggling a little less.  And that you're still hilarious.  

Love, 
Charlotte

The Pragmatism and Privilege Arguments - NY Election 2014

*I do want to mention that the author of the letter I reference here, and so many other people who are encouraging folks to vote for Cuomo on the WFP line, are, to the best of my knowledge, good people, smart people, and people who really want to help everyone and make a better world.  I understand that, despite the fact that I come off as... slightly angry in this post.  

Andrew Cuomo is, quite frankly, a bad person.  He is not just a bad politician.  He's a liar, a player, and overly ambitious.  He's shown us that he cares about himself more than he cares about any random stranger on the street.  

And yet, "progressives" are encouraging us to vote for him.  

Are you kidding?  

They're not.  And I get it.  I get wanting to believe that what the Working Families Party did was good.  It would be wonderful if the democratic party and WFP were good and could be reformed.  But they can't.  No party that sells out working people is a party worth voting for.  

But a lot of people say that voting WFP (for Cuomo) is the best way to send a strong message and to get real results in fights that matter.  (Fights like the one for publicly financed elections, a minimum wage raise, the decriminalization of marijuana and so much more.)  This open letter is a perfect example of the effort people are giving to get Cuomo elected on the WFP line.  

Go read it.  It's pretty bad.  

Real quick summary of most people's arguments:  He's going to win, he might as well get as many WFP votes as possible, because it'll send him a message that we're expecting him to follow through on his promises.  

Talk about defeat.  Let me just make this clear.  The only message Andrew Cuomo will receive if he gets a ton of WFP votes is that his strategy of bullying and manipulation works.  We will have told him that he can threaten us into obedience.  

My friends, that is NOT a message I want to send.   

I want to address a few of the problems with that letter. 

1. "Then the unexpected happened. Governor Cuomo caved. At the last minute, he pledged to push through Fair Elections. And that wasn't all. He agreed to a minimum wage increase with indexing. He agreed to pass the full, 10-point women's equality agenda. He agreed to push through the NYS DREAM Act. He agreed to marijuana decriminalization. He even agreed, remarkably, to help flip the state senate and push for a reunification of the IDC and the Dems -- making it easier to advance a progressive legislative agenda in 2015."  

Problem:  This is not unexpected.  A democratic candidate for a democratic state was threatened with a challenger, so he.... agreed to agree to align with his own party?  Wow, how monumental.  He didn't even give a strong statement in support of the positions.  he just said he would support them.  He could have tattooed the platform on his body and it still wouldn't be enough because agreeing to your own party's ideals is the fucking baseline for running on that line.  Cuomo did the bare minimum, let's throw him a spot on our line.  

2. "There were those of us (like myself) who didn't think his promises were enough. Who argued passionately for Zephyr. Who were heartbroken and bitterly resentful when the WFP state committee voted -- in an admittedly transparent and beautifully democratic process -- to endorse Cuomo. It was, I believed at the time, a violation of our principles and everything we stood for as a party and as a movement."

Problem:  The process underwent when the WFP decided to run Cuomo was the exact opposite of transparent and beautifully democratic.  The vast majority of WFP voters wanted the party to run its own candidate.  But it caved to threats from the governor and from unions (obviously not the rank and file members).  I mean I guess that's beautifully democratic in a sense that that's how democracy works in America.  But then, America doesn't have true democracy. 

3. "Despite feeling somewhat vindicated by Zephyr's performance in the primary, I gradually came to understand that my position was a position of privilege. You see, I am blessed not to have to work for minimum wage. I don't have to struggle to make ends meet, to put food on the table. I don't have to worry about whether or not I will be able to afford college. If I am caught smoking marijuana, the color of my skin means I won't spend very much (if any) time behind bars. And so I began to realize that the endorsement I so resented wasn't at all the "selling out" of the party we helped to build. It was, instead, an emotionally challenging decision reached after many hours of difficult deliberation by a bunch of kind, caring, strategic individuals attempting to use their little bit of influence over the governor to make life better, in tangible ways, for millions of struggling New Yorkers." 

Problem: I've heard the privilege argument from so many people.  They say that real New Yorkers need change now, and being idealistic and hoping for something that can't happen and protesting doesn't get us anywhere near real change.  If Cuomo will agree to support (so, at best, not go against) a fight for a $10 minimum wage, that's where we need to throw our support.  Because it's not fair to ask for more when they're not the ones whose lives are at stake.  

Well, my livelihood is at stake.  I don't always know where my next meal is coming from.  I lost my job a few months ago, and my life has become a constant struggle.  When I got food stamps a couple of months ago, I nearly cried from relief.  So fuck the argument that it's a privileged position to want more for NY.  I honestly need to know if anyone bothered to ask low income people how they felt before making this claim.  It is infuriating when people making a living wage do this act (wth good intentions, to be fair) to actually hinder real change.  

I make about $600 a month.  These bullshit political strategies to maintain power and maybe - maybe - get tiny changes or to get words of support from a governor who loves rhetoric but not action is not helping me.  Want to know a privileged position?  One that says dump your ideals and real problems and do what will keep the WFP alive.  This argument feels to me more like "stand up for the poor people, they need us!" than "listen to and then stand up with the poor people, we all need each other!"  And that is a very dangerous thing.  

I think, if people truly examined their own privilege (me included, because I may be living in poverty, but, like the author of the letter, I'm not black.  I'm not LGBTQ.  I have privilege too.), they'd see that the single best way to change this state is to vote your conscience (which may mean not voting at all this time around) and more importantly, standing up, arms linked together, and demanding more.  If we want to be realistic, this election isn't going to change things.  Mass demonstrations are.  Strikes are.  People doing things together, not strategized BS elections, are the real change makers.

4. "You can throw your vote away on a protest vote for Howie Hawkins and the Green Party. Or, you can vote on the Working Families Party ballot line to hold Governor Cuomo accountable to his promises to raise wages, pass Fair Elections, and make New York State work for all of us."

Problem:  I can't believe I have to even say this, but there is no such thing as "throwing your vote away."  How incredibly cynical and undemocratic.  

And a protest vote?  Howie Hawkins' platform is almost identical to my own.  He is the bravest and boldest candidate in this election.  A Cuomo win will not produce tangible results (not good ones.  I'm sure there will be tangible results as in more kids starving and things like that.), but a Hawkins win certainly would.  

5. "As much as we all hate to hold our noses when we vote, and as tempting as it might be to vote green, this is a time when we need to be pragmatic more than idealistic." 

Problem:  Ah, the argument that is made every single election.  We always choose the less of two evils, and we always get screwed over.  After so many years of that, I need to ask, why in the world do you still believe this lie?  Pragmatism has done nothing for me.  We need to be more idealistic and more creative in our ways of fighting oppression.  The claim that voting for Cuomo will achieve anything good is just absurd. 

Honestly, I'm hoping that very few people vote on the WFP line.  I'd like to see it go away, as it's nothing more than a puppet for the democratic party.  This election, I'll either be voting for Hawkins or for no one.  

If you want change, and you want things like a living wage, then you'll mix pragmatism and idealism and realize that voting for Cuomo isn't an acceptable thing to do and that voting for the lesser of two evils is not our only option.  We can put our bodies on the line, invoke the spirit of revolutionaries before us, and get back to the grassroots.  It is the only thing that has truly brought about positive change in this country.   

_

Charlotte 

Goodbye, Apartment

I have to move out of my apartment soon and it's making me sad. 

There are things I definitely will not miss.  I won't miss the landlord randomly showing up.  I will not miss the person above me running in place for hours at a time.  I won't miss the moldy smell that creeps up at random times around the windows.  I definitely, definitely will not miss the freezing cold temperatures in the winter because the heat doesn't work (even though the heat bill hits $500/mo???).  I will not miss the evil squirrels.   I'm pretty sure it's haunted.  I will not miss that. 

  

But the good outweighs the bad on this place and I'm going to miss it.  I'm going to miss the bookshelves, even though it took me a little while to be okay with the lack of symmetry.  

I'm going to miss the gigantic windows.  I like the sunlight and the views and all, but it's also really cool because it sort of works like a clock.  When sun is coming specifically though a certain window, I know (roughly) the time of day.  

I'm going to miss living within walking distance of so many churches.  They're different denominations, but without fail, my apartment is filled with the sound of church bells and music every Sunday.  It's lovely. 

I'm going to miss the neighborhood.  It's near a huge park, it's surrounded by historic apartment buildings.  I know the block over is one I definitely could not afford to live on, but the one I DO live on has a really great working class vibe.  My neighbors are all super friendly.  (Okay, most of them are.)  There are just so many good things about the neighborhood.  It's close to two libraries.  It's close to an old school firehouse.  I'm within walking distance to so many different kinds of food places.  Mexican, Indian, Chinese, burger joint, delis and SO MANY MORE.  I like that it's diverse and there are so many different kinds of people here.  I like that there are kids riding their bikes around and old people walking dogs (or really, being walked by their dogs).  It's a breath of fresh air from the apartment I used to live in, where we didn't really encounter anyone.  It always smells good outside.  When I get home from work I'm met with the smells of everyone's dinners.  The people next door have sauce at least once a week and it always smells incredible.  The city in general is fantastic.

There's always construction going on.  That annoys most people, but I love construction.  I don't know why.  One of my neighbors is always working on old cars.  I love that.  I love brick buildings, and I get to see them through my windows every day.  I love buildings in general (architecture and urban planning and engineering stuff makes me happy) and this block is filled with interesting buildings.  I'll miss the constant smell of BBQ from people grilling on their fire escapes in the summer.  (I won't miss wondering how the people who live in the building without the escape would get out God forbid there was ever a fire.)  

There's a patio that can be filled with flowers and a fake fireplace that is great for decorating during any season.  I'll miss those.  There are quirky tiles randomly placed on walls in the bathroom that have silhouettes on them and I think they're so cool.  I guess that's something that can be replicated elsewhere, so I shouldn't get too down about that.

This apartment is in the perfect location and that's probably what I'll miss most.  I'm trying to not get too negative about leaving, but it took me a little while to feel comfortable here and there are things that I love so much about this place.    

Here's hoping that I'll be open to looking for things to love wherever I end up next. 

_

Charlotte 

Literary Baby Names

The baby name posts seem to be popular, so here's another list.

Literary Names for Girls

1. Molly is, apparently, the number one name given to female dogs in America.  It is totally a human name, so that annoys me.  I say everyone name their daughters after Molly Weasley from Harry Potter and make this the number one name given to female humans.

2. Prim.  I am only including this because everywhere I look, people seem to be naming their baby daughters after characters from The Hunger Games - fine, but if that's the case let's use Primrose instead of Katniss.

3. Jane, after Jane Austen.

4. Anne.  Who doesn't love Anne of Green Gables?  (And Anne is a timeless name.)

5. Hattie, because I'm not done obsessing over The Twelve Tribes of Hattie.

6. Matilda.  Every person I've ever met has loved the movie Matilda, and those who've read the book loved it, too.

7. Minny is my favorite character in The Help, followed closely by Aibileen.

8. Susan and

9. Lucy from The Chronicles of Narnia.

10. Madeline from....... Madeline.

Literary Names for Boys 

1. Billy, because The Polar Express is incredible.

2. Fred and

3. George, because I'm fairly certain they are everyone's favorite characters from HP.

4. Gabriel.  Jonas is perfectly nice, but I personally would go with Gabriel if I wanted to name a kid after a character from The Giver.

5. David.  Hurricane (by David Wiesner) was my favorite book when I was little.  (David is the name of one of the main characters, not just the name of the author.)

6. Peter and

7. Edmund (or any name that starts with "Ed") from The Chronicles of Narnia.

8. Hugo, off of the film Hugo, based on the book, The Invention of Hugo Cabret.

9. Gale.  Again, if people want to name kids after characters in The Hunger Games, I can totally get behind "Gale" being a thing.

10. Harry, obviously.

(pssst.  I was stressing because I felt like I needed to write a blog post, but couldn't think of anything to write, so this was thrown together real lazy-like.  Perhaps at a later date there can be a part 2, especially since my friends who helped write the baby girl names and baby boy names for twins posts said they had some ideas for literary names.)