Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Girl Power: Go to Your Doctor

You should know, dearest reader (hi Liz...), that writing this post is painfully difficult.  Sometimes I procrastinate and sometimes I'm lazy but I'm not those things by default.  That is something a lot of people in my life have a hard time understanding.  But, my mood is basically shot right now and it's taking effort to do anything.  


So this post that is supposed to be my hobby/fun is like ripping teeth out.  But I keep trying to remind myself that I'll be glad later when I think about the fact that I did something today.  After this comes a cover letter.  (By the way, I'm regretting not making a pact before graduation with friends that we'd just do each other's resumes and cover letters.  We're all better at talking each other up than we are at boasting about ourselves.)

But yes, this post.  Stay on topic, Char. 

I just read this article on NPR.  It's about how women often wait to seek medical attention when they're experiencing troubling symptoms.  

"But even when women suspected that they were having a heart attack, many said they were hesitant to bring it up because they didn't want to look like hypochondriacs." 

Grrr. 

This is no joke.  Not counting family pre-college, I've lived with five women and most of my closest friends are women.  And I've seen this mentality often, in all of us, though it manifests in different ways.  I'd say two-thirds of the time, we're hesitant to go to the doctor because we don't want to be thought of as drama queens.  The other, almost scarier third is when we discourage each other from going.  

"It's probably nothing." 
"You're most likely fine." 
"Are you really in that much pain?"

Now, if you stub your toe (though that's the effing worst), I will probably roll my eyes if you want to go to the doctor.  Unless your nail came all the way off and you want that prescription lotion or something.  You know. 

But if you're having consistent pain?  Abnormal pain?  I shouldn't tell you you're exaggerating.  And you shouldn't say it to me, either.  

We talk a lot about women being tougher than men, namely because men do not give birth.   

"They couldn't deal with sciatica for months and months and months!"  
"They couldn't be nauseous for weeks at a time." 
"They couldn't push something the size of a watermelon out of a hole the size of a lemon." 

(Did you cringe at the last one?  I cringed at the last one.  God bless women.)

And based on those super scientific video-studies of men "experiencing" birth, I'd say that yeah, most men probably could not handle the physical pain, whereas most women can and do.  Their bodies haven't evolved with the need to.  (This is not to say men aren't tough or strong.  Many are.  And I'm not a fan of judging the seriousness of one person's pain or struggles based on another's.  I just bring this up to point out the irony of society thinking women can't handle pain.)

So we've got this fun little scenario where women can handle the trauma and pain of childbirth, but we're also thought of as weak, and we're also... worried about looking like drama queens.

It doesn't really make sense whichever way we look at it.  If the claim is that most women can tolerate pain, you'd think that the threshold of pain is raised, so women should always be taken seriously when they say they're in pain.  Someone who deals with 3-9 days of excruciating cramps every single month probably isn't going to exaggerate her pain.

On the other side of the spectrum, if women were as weak as everyone thinks, why would you not take our complaints seriously?  Obviously not agreeing that women are weak.  Just looking at the logic of this fairly common thought process.  The patriarchy often views women as children.  If a child, clearly not as strong or tough as a grown ass man, said they were in serious pain, would it make sense to ignore them or to roll your eyes?  Probably not.  It would likely be cause for concern.

Somehow, society has managed to patronize us, then hold us up to these weird ass standards of pain, then scoff at us when we say we're sick.  And it's become internalized.  And that is infuriating.

For me personally, I think there's an added dimension because I didn't have the most supportive family, and on top of many other not nice names, I was constantly called a hypochondriac and a drama queen.  (Which is even sadder because I was told I was sick when I wasn't, that I had life threatening conditions when I didn't, etc. etc.)  So now, I feel like an idiot whenever I have something physically wrong.  I hesitate to tell even the people I am closest to when I'm not feeling okay, and when I do, I often start it with something like, "I hate complaining about this, but...."

I shouldn't have to qualify my honest-to-God problems.  I shouldn't worry that I'll be called a hypochondriac, nor should any of my other friends.

Once I finally got health insurance, I found a doctor and thankfully, he's terrific.  He has never once questioned the validity of a complaint or the reality of my symptoms.  I have some great specialists, but no one can top my primary.  A few months back, I went to the ER.  I had terrible pains that I could not physically handle any longer.  No OTC pain meds were cutting it on the pain management scene.  The kicker is that I had these same pains the month before.  I told two people about it, and both said to go to the ER, but I didn't listen.  I thought that I'd go and they'd roll their eyes at another girl having cramps on her period.  So another month passed and the next time, I couldn't NOT go to the hospital.  It turns out, there was a mass on my ovary.  I was told to see a specialist immediately for imaging and possible biopsy.  I ended up having surgery, and the damage was extensive.  I'm fine now, but had I not put off seeking medical attention, I could have had the diagnosis sooner, the surgery sooner.

I'm not going to dwell on that bad decision forever, but it's another example of the widespread issue of women fearing judgement for seeking medical help.

When I did go to a specialist two days after the ER visit, the doctor literally rolled her eyes, told me the ER technicians probably didn't know what they were talking about, that it was most likely fine, and that I just have to deal with the cramps.  She gave me birth control and called it a day.  That wonderful primary of mine?  I called him after the appointment, he told me to come in, and we discussed everything.  He assured me that the specialist was out of line and that if he had something in his body, he would want it out as soon as possible.  He told me not to think I was being over-dramatic for wanting a second opinion, and he and the secretaries found another OBGYN to see.  That specialist and his whole practice were very helpful, and if anything were more concerned about my symptoms than I was.

That NPR article quotes a doctor who says that they need to find ways to make women feel empowered when it comes to health.  I think doctors who currently don't take complaints seriously should start.

As for society, I don't know.  I mean smash the patriarchy, yes, but I don't know what we could do right this second to fight this problem.  I suppose the first step would be for men and women alike to take the women in your life seriously when they express concern over something health-related.  This is probably harder than it seems psychologically, but that doesn't matter.  Fake it.  Keep telling yourself your friends aren't hypochondriacs.  Tell yourself you are not a hypochondriac.  It might feel like a lie at first (it definitely did with me, but after tons of tests confirming real problems, I'm starting to understand that no, I'm not just a drama queen).  Yeah, it'll feel like a lie at first, but it's actually the truth and it'll eventually sink in.  And that's important.

Oh, and go find a really great doctor, if you're able.  (I know, health insurance in this country sucks.)

__
Charlotte   




Monday, February 23, 2015

Weekling: W. 17

For previous posts in this series, go here: Weeklings



Happenings


I'm supposed to post this on either Saturday or Sunday.  I effed up.  I guess this gets me out of having to write something more difficult today though.  Ah, no need for thinking.

Getting a job did not happen this week.  I'm starting to go a little nutso without a job or any of my friends.  No bueno.

I did get a new phone, finally.  I've had to switch phones about four times in the last year, so hopefully this will be the last time for a while.  The one I had been using wasn't stellar.  So far, this one is.  I can take fancy pictures.  For example:

The very fanciest.
That picture?  Torture.  I gave up Coke for Lent, like a moron.  Hold me.

It snowed here (Hey!  It started as I was wrapping up my last weekling.) and iced over and only melted away today.  If I'm in the south, I at least want good weather.  Ugh.

Basically nothing else happened this week.  What a life.

Thankful for

New phone.  This new-to-me blog.  Ginger Ale (especially during aforementioned period of no Coke).  My friends.  This book.

Books I'm reading now 

Still working on Red China Blues.  And re-read Anne of Green Gables.  This is why I never finish my book lists.

Random




You know how Facebook has targeted ads?  And how they're creepy as Hell?  Wellllll, THIS ad was on my feed the other day.  Thanks, Facebook.  Mean.  No thanks. 

Want to know a great rice recipe?  Maybe everyone knows this recipe, but on the off chance it's unknown, here goes:

2 cups white rice (does not matter what size grain)
4-ish cups chicken broth (you'll never go back to using water) I sometimes use a little more than 4.
1 yellow onion
1/3 - 1/2 stick of butter (you do you)

Then just follow normal rice rules.  Bring to a quick boil, lower that bad boy down to a 1 or 2, cover, and let it be for a few minutes (the box says 15-20, but I don't think I've ever let it sit for less than 25, and I've seen others cook it for up to 45, so... experiment).

Devour.

To-do

Still, get a job.



 Also, I have been saying I want to write a book for at least four years.  This week, I want to at least make some sort of plan. 

Links worth looking at

Healing in Post-War Gaza  - The Washington Post
I'm glad that they published this.  I can't understand how anyone would argue that Israel is completely justified in what they do. 

The Science of Redheads - IFLScience 
We're NOT going extinct!  Yay.  

This is sweet.  

"There is obviously nothing inherently wrong with saying that “Muslim lives matter,” but contextually, it’s being used parallel to #BlackLivesMatter — it’s meant to evoke the same concepts, using the same kind of language. This appropriation of a movement is counterproductive and frankly unfair to both the Black and Muslim communities. We should not be blending together two complex, multifaceted issues for the sake of convenience. It’s a reductive move that simplifies both struggles, and it only contributes to erasing the very real, very dangerous implications that Islamophobia specifically holds for Muslims."  (I've heard folks suggest using #justiceformuslims instead.)

Rewriting the Future - BitchMedia
My friend shared this and I love it.  "We started the anthology with the belief that all organizing is science fiction. When we talk about a world without prisons; a world without police violence; a world where everyone has food, clothing, shelter, quality education; a world free of white supremacy, patriarchy, capitalism, heterosexism; we are talking about a world that doesn’t currently exist. But collectively dreaming up one that does means we can begin building it into existence." 

I think it's great that this man was given a car and money, but charity isn't enough and definitely doesn't fix the greater problem. 

This is amazing and I want a horizontal fridge. 

I'm being a troll here, because I'm only sharing it to say I don't love it.  I mean, the "after" is perfectly nice, but it's getting old.  The white with shades of grey, brown, and blue with just plants as color is getting old.  I don't know.  I like the before picture better.  

This was a nice read. 

Schools shouldn't be run like businesses, and business language shouldn't be applied to education.  On point. 

Okay, it just hit me that I'm annoyed by the title (the article deals with much more than just her boyfriend).  But this was an interesting read.  I'm a pro NASA and publicly funded Mars mission person, and this is for a privately funded mission so that also annoys me but I'm ignoring it all to look at this woman's perspective.  You should give it a read. 

Bonus

I cannot even believe this is happening, but it's starting to snow.  I think maybe I should NOT write these, because the only time it's snowed here are the two times I've written these damn posts.  GO AWAY, SNOW. 


__


Charlotte

Friday, February 20, 2015

Dream House(s)

I've been sitting on Pinterest going crazy over clawfoot tubs so I figured why not be productive and turn that addiction into a blog post?  


First Up: Exteriors

I'm not very decisive when it comes to what I want a house to look like on the outside.  (Or, whether or not I want to live in a city...)  I love brownstones, farmhouses, and basically anything with a porch.  But I also like small, cute houses.  And I love brick.  Decisive.  Here are my favorite exteriors (figured I should do one of each type of house I like). 

1. El Brownstone
Source 
Part of me really wants to live in a city.  Buuuuut, part of me does not.  BUT if I do, my dream house would look something like that ^.

2. The Farmhouse  
Source
 Like I said, I don't know if I want to live in the city.  Because look at that house.  I totally want chickens one day to save hard-earned $3/week on eggs, and that kind of land would be nice.  Plus it's just pretty.  And green.  And lovely.

3. The Brick House 
Source
 My love for brick knows no boundaries.  Loooook how warm that looks.  

4. The Thomas Kinkade House

Source
 Swoon.  This looks like a painting.  I want to live here. 

The Kitchen

I have a crush on red and blue kitchens.  But I also have a crush on whites and yellows.  And also subway tile.  Ahem, and so many other things.  But these are my absolute favorite kitchen-pinspirations: 

1. The Big Kitchen (Remember, I need to pick one for a house and one for a brownstone.  Obviously.)

Source
LOOK AT IT.  I'd feel silly saying "swoon" again but... yeah.  The light walls with deep floor color go so well with the blue-ish cabinets.  It's colorful without being too colorful.  And sooo much counter space.  And so many cabinets!  I also like the mix of glass fronts up top and regular cabinets on the bottom.  And the hood.  And the huge stove.  And the butcher block island.  Swooooooooooon. 

2. The Smaller Kitchen 

Source
You know, I think I just have a thing for butcher block.  (Butcher's block?)  You get what I'm saying. 

The Dining Room 

I like food rooms. 

1. The Big Dining Room 

Source
I'm not usually this colorful, but I realllllly like this.  I like the colors of the chairs with the light-ish wood table and white walls.  And I love how many people it seats.  I like cooking for everyone and their mothers, so a 14-seat table sounds perfect. 

2. The Smaller Dining Room 

Source
This is way smaller than I'd normally like.  WAY smaller.  In fact I'm questioning including it.  But since sometimes city living means not having real space, I'll include this fetus of a dining room because I do think it's kind of charming and bright and warm and easy to pull together. I'd probably pull the table away from the wall a bit, though. 

The Living Room

The best room in a house!  These are my current favorites: 

1. The Big Living Room 

Source
I think it's highly unlikely that I will ever have a living room this fabulous, but this post is titled "dream house" so I'm including it. 

2. The Smaller Living Room

Source
My current (realistic) living room crush.  This looks clean and neat, but soooo cozy.  I need it. 

The Office

1. The Big Office

Source
Heaven on Earth.  Look at the big desk!  (I love having a huge desk/table area to spread papers all over while working.)  AND LOOK AT THE STORAGE.  And how light and airy.  Want. 

2. The Smaller "Office"

Source
Okay, not so much an office as some desk space.  But look how pretty.  I am a big fan of wall paper and or murals.  Big, big fan. 

The Bathroom

I just want a clawfoot tub.  I picked this image, but really I'll take any bathroom with a clawfoot tub. 

Source
Behold. This bathroom would change my life. 

The Bedroom

I don't need a huge bedroom.  I don't understand the obsession with big bedrooms (except for kids, because they're good to play in or to sleep several kids or whatever).  So I just base it on how pretty it is.  Aka do you know how hard it was to pick just one?  They're all so pretty.  But I'm liking the feel of this one. 

Source
It's pretty without being too girly.  And the natural light?  What's that?............swoon. 

Rooms for Los Children

I don't have kids but this is a theoretical post so I'm including this room.  Kids rooms are way more fun. 

Source
I get that this is a dream house post and so I could have included the amazing Harry Potter rooms or princess rooms or whatever that are alllll over Pinterest, but when I have kids I'd rather their rooms be filled with siblings than with loads and loads of things they don't need.  

And finally...........

The Outside

1. City Garden (A deck or small patio)

Source
Can I please have coffee out here every morning? 

2. As Much Room as I Want

Source
MAGICAL THING OF MAGIC. 

Annnnnnnnnnnd that wraps it up.  Now to guess the winning lotto numbers.......

__
Charlotte






Monday, February 16, 2015

Weeklings Are Back! W.16 - Valentine's Day and Pre-Lent Edition

For previous posts in this series, go here: Weeklings 

A few months ago I stopped writing these because they became repetitive.  Every week was pretty much a new health problem, going crazy without having a job, and basically just stressing. 

Some of that is still the same.  I'm not in good health yet and I had to move and have not found a job yet, but it feels different because at least some of my health stuff has been handled (had surgery) and so I can look for a job without worrying about needing to take off for medical procedures all the time.  So that's cool and I guess it might be time to bring these back.

Happenings

Like I said, I had surgery.  That was probably the biggest thing.  They diagnosed endometriosis.  The surgery was mostly successful, but there was more growth than they anticipated and some of my organs are still "stuck together" which leads to a lot of pain.  The hope is that I don't need another surgery, but my doctor did warn that there was a solid chance I might need a more extensive surgery involving an additional surgeon.  Thanks, Obama.

I needed to move to North Carolina.  I'll probably be here for a year, year and a half.  I miss New York and that's where I really want to be, but wow the weather here is amazing.  It was 65 degrees the other day.  In February.  Swoon.  

I'm also watching all the Star Wars movies, so there's that.  Probably the most important thing in my life at the moment, no?

  
Also, Valentine's Day.  Nothing special, really, since I'm single (and probably not that special if I wasn't) but I do like any reason to bake pretty things.  I wasn't going to do anything, but there are more people here than we were expecting (winter break), so FOOD. 


Thankful for

Aforementioned beautiful weather.  The best fitting jeans ever, making it possible for me to dress without hurting the incisions from surgery.  My friends, Olivia who is always entertaining (and pulled me out of freezing water after I fell through ice - I forgot to include that in her post) and Liz, who is joining me in some penances for Lent even though she is Jewish.  What a friend. 

Books I'm reading now

Currently working through Red China Blues.  

Random

On Saturday (Valentine's Day) I started having chest pains.  I've had chest pains before, but not like these.  But, I didn't want to be a drama queen and I figured it was nothing so I ignored it for 10-15 minutes until it got so bad that I couldn't.  At that point I woke up my grandpa and it was so bad that I hardly got the word "hospital" out.  My hands got tingly and numb and then my hearing got muffled and I got really dizzy.  

I've been scared plenty of times, but I have only been that scared a few times.  The single worst time was when my sister was taking a bath.  I knocked on the door or called her name every few minutes to check on her, and one time she didn't answer.  So I said her name again, louder.  (My palms are getting sweaty just thinking of this again.)  She didn't answer.  I freaked so bad.  I threw the door open, putting a hole in the wall with the knob in the process, and saw that she was under the water, eyes closed.  That was the single scariest thing I've experienced.  I pulled her up out of the water and she was fine.  In fact, she said she was just relaxing and she yelled at me for ruining her bath.  I could have killed her.  I told her she'd never take a bath again.  Reasonable and Rational are my middle names.  (She has taken baths since.) 

Another time was recently, when another little sister and I went to the movies, and at the end this man in the front near the exit stood up and pointed his hand toward the rest of the theater and started yelling.  It was obviously pretty dark, and no one could see well, but the way he was pointing his hand, combined with the facts that he was yelling and was near the exit, made everyone think the worst.  The first thing that came to mind was the theater shooting a few years back.  I felt numb and started putting Rebecca to the floor, telling her to get down and other people in the theater started doing the same with their kids and friends.  It turned out to just be an angry man yelling about something pissing him off (after the movie he was in the hallway complaining about getting hit with popcorn).  That was another terrifying thing.  

This Saturday was the third scariest thing I've experienced.  After the pains didn't go away and once my hearing got muffled I thought that I had been wrong, it wasn't nothing, and that there was a chance I was going to die.  It was horrible.  

Turns out, I had the perfect cocktail of way too much caffeine paired with post-surgery medicine and that little combo triggered something very similar to an anxiety attack, causing the exact symptoms of a heart attack.  Fun, fun, fun.  

To-do

Ah.  No fun DIY things.  I need neeeeeeed to find a job. 

Links worth looking at

Watch this video of a host implying that a Muslim man is incapable of writing anything valid about Jesus.  (And, the way he describes his book and talks about Jesus as a revolutionary makes me want to go get read the book right now.) 

Do you ever need help with Lent?  I usually need help with Lent.  This ended a lot of confusion for me. 

I read this and gave an "awww" and then ignored the advice come Valentine's Day. 

I love this kind of stuff.  

So I've seen a few of these commercials and they always give me feels.  Whoever is behind the commercials is doing his or her job right. 

More of this, please.  

I love Snape, but this article is on point.  He's a good character and all, but the worship is a little much.  And the article is right, he probably would be uncomfortable with Harry naming his son after him.  

Jesus is Not My Personal Savior - Becoming Peculiar 
I looooove this.  "So I don’t feel right saying things like “Jesus is my personal lord and saviour.” For starters, I almost never feel like he speaks directly to me in private. I almost exclusively know him through you folks, and he only enters my heart through interactions with you... Jesus is our lord and saviour. We are saved collectively."  On point. 

Accurate x10, unfortunately.  

Random 

Valentine's Day - Maybe I should have concentrated all of my Valentine's Day-themed stories for one spot in this post, but hindsight, right?  The day before Valentine's Day, I decided I'd throw myself a little pity party and went to the store to buy myself some chocolate.  Then, when I got there, I was like, "Is this really treating yourself or are you just making excuses and doing something you'll be annoyed with yourself for later?"  And then, probably for the first time ever, I turned away from the chocolate aisle, left the store, and went for a walk.  I told myself that was probably actually treating yourself and whatnot.  And then I did a little research on some vitamins, because I'm sick of feeling lousy all the time. 

Lent - I already mentioned that Liz is "doing Lent" with me this year.  We just made a semi-plan.  She's giving up candy and not eating meat on Fridays.  And she's taking up exercising a bit.  (She recommends morning yoga.  Bunny edition...)

On top of fasting and of not having meat on Fridays, I'm giving up Coke completely.  I wasn't sure what to do, because I've already tried giving up or at least decreasing the amount of bad crap I do.  I eat and drink way less sugar (and wow, am I ever going to enjoy coffee again?), I don't buy as much stuff, etc. etc.  So I think not drinking any Coke at all (as opposed to letting myself have some, but not as much as I used to) is good.  I'm also limiting myself to one cup of coffee a day, but that's something I was going to need to do for health reasons anyway.  Liz and I also agreed to work on doing some of these every day: 25 Science-Backed Ways to Change Your Life by Taking Better Care of Yourself.  Annnnnnd I'll be reading some of this every day: God Is on the Cross: Reflections on Lent and Easter.  

Bonus 

That nice weather I was just loving on?  Yeah, it just started snowing.  


 __
Charlotte

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Person: Liz

No one calls her Elizabeth but "Liz" just didn't look right in the picture so that's that.
In my head I refer to Liz as her first and last name, but as I don't want the whole wide world knowing her deats, I'm not using her full name here and it is irking me real hard.  So I think I might make up a last name for her for this post.  OH HOW ABOUT BENNET?  Thanks, Jane.  

Liz Bennet and I met when we were nerds in our university's student association.  We were senators, and this kid neither of us talk to anymore said we'd get along and so we sat next to each other and shared Swedish Fish and the rest is history, as they say.  (But really, how could sharing Swedish Fish not force a bond?  Liz could be an ahole and I'd still be her friend because Swedish Fish are just that good.)

She also just logged off of Facebook even though I have more things to tell her.  What a B. 

I have different kinds of friends.  There are the ones I've known since childhood, some I enjoy hanging out with but will probably never think of as family, and there are the select few that I really grew up with.  Like, we met when we were quasi-adults but pretty much still teenagers and we've navigated this whole becoming an adult thing together.  Liz is one of those friends.  I think we've seen each other become ourselves (I mean, we're still in the process, but you know) and that's amazing when you think about it.  Or at least I think it is.  I mean, being along for the ride while your friend figures out who she is?  Gah, teary-eyed. 


Liz Bennet is like, I don't know.  Quirky?  She talks with her hands like no other.  And her facial expressions are on point.  I haven't tried, but I could probably have a full conversation with Liz without her verbally uttering a single syllable.  She is that expressive.  It's great.  

I just decided that Liz Bennet is now Liz's actual new nickname. 

Liz is all accomplished now.  She's got this job that she is very into and she's doing awesome things with it, such as publishing this report (!!!!!!!!!!).  It's a lot of fun to watch.  She is doing the whole being-an-adult-living-life-well thing like a boss.  In Grey's Anatomy, Cristina and Meredith are getting over a fight they had when Meredith, who is clearly happy that Cristina is achieving her goals (because duh, they're BFFs, of course she's happy for her), says, "I'm so jealous of you I want to set things on fire."  I have bad luck and if I lit something on fire I'd probably just end up burning myself or suffering from smoke inhalation but let's just say I'm the Meredith to Liz's Cristina.  (More happy than jealous though.  Because like, we're not in the same field.) 

Now that I am thinking about it, we totally could be Meredith and Cristina.  I mean, they are called the twisted sisters.  We've also compared ourselves to Lorelai and Sookie before.  

It's sickening how accurate this is. 
Liz and I are similar.  Like, very similar.  In fact, ten minutes ago we were talking on Facebook and it turns out that we had just been doing the same things (reading the same article, browsing the same website) and she asked if we share a brain.  Sometimes, I think we might.  We both are into books, want to have our own libraries in our houses, go to bed fairly early, enjoy Say Yes to the Dress and Gilmore Girls entirely too much.  No, just kidding, there's no such thing as enjoying GG too much.

We both love food.  Usually, I don't like talking about or eating too much junk food when I'm with friends who are very thin (good confidence levels over here), but Liz is the exception.  She and I text each other when we eat McDonalds or buy a box of donuts at the store.  If I looked at all 40,000 of our fb messages, I think I'd conclude that we talk about food more than anything.  Liz Bennet is the only person who doesn't judge me (and actually, who agrees!) when I say that Taco Bell is helpful when you're recovering from sickness.  Unless it's a headache sitch, in which case, go get yourself chicken nuggets and a Coke from McD's. 

She's a fairly good person.  Liz has this phobia/hatred of throwing up, and yet when I called her this one time when I was incredibly sick, she brought me bananas and ginger ale.  What a fucking friend, am I right?  (I swear, Liz, I didn't even think of that fact that you hate throw up when I called you that day.  My bad, bro, my bad.)  I'm told she basically boiled her hands after touching the doorknob.  Again, quite the friend.  

As similar as we are, we also want totally different things in life.  Liz has dreams of travel and incredible career goals and I'm over here like, omg I want to get married and have kids.  She's endured many an "I'm going to end up alone with 700 cats" rants and only sometimes looks at me like I'm crazy when I say my ovaries hurt whenever we see a baby or something.  For real, some of my friends super judge when I talk about wanting that kind of life, but Liz does not.  At least not maliciously.  She'll say I'm nuts, but it's usually lovingly.  I think slash hope.  I think the fact that we want such different things but feel totally comfortable talking about them to each other is proof of how strong our relationship is.  Good friendship, man.  

Any concept of boundaries is pretty much nonexistent with us.  We looked at pictures of my uterus and ovaries while eating dinner one night like it was no big thang.  Neither of us have a problem telling the other about bodily functions, let's say.  If one of us is sick (neither of us get an A on the health situation), we usually don't hesitate to give the other very specific, detailed descriptions of symptoms.  It's gross and great.  It's so nice to have a human to talk to about certain things instead of having to google it since you're too embarrassed to ask a friend.  Hell to the no.  

I talk to Liz more than I talk to anyone (poor thing).  I sent her a message earlier because it was so weird that we hadn't talked in over 12 hours.  I cannot decide if this is cute or pathetic, but it is.  And that's nice.    

We've been friends for around four-ish years, but I think the fact that we always get the same results on Buzzfeed quizzes indicates that we can plan on being friends for that x20 more years, for sure.  (Ugh, it's gonna be a long life. ;)

Can you feel the love?
xoxo.

__
Charlotte